Distant Relatives

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Nine WEird Tag~!

Okay, finally done my homework!
Was tagged by _butt and redsponge!

Nine Weird Points :

1. Split Personality
2. Sarcastic Between The Lines

3. No Multitasking Ability
4. Toilet Freak
5. New Found Love - Blogging For Hours
6. Happy Past Collector
7. The Forgotten Past
8. An Old Shirt
9. Unripened Banana


1. Split Personality

When one talks about being weird, yeah this comes up :)

I have obvious split personality. I do enjoy being lame and comical
most of the time, but when I'm serious, I'm DEAD serious. Especially
when I'm working on something.

Don't play play people, Mr.Goober is eine gemini!

(top)

2. Sarcastic Between The Lines

I can be weirdly sarcastic.

This means, I crack sarcastic jokes even when I'm looking stern.

I also find it funny for people who can read between the lines,
instead of having them stare back at you like a drug addict.

...or maybe they really were, drug addicts??

(top)

3. No Multitasking Ability

I can't focus on anything when I'm doing one thing.
Try talking and yakking to me while I'm working, you'll only hear
me "uh huh.." monotonously.

So need a listening ear? Talk to me while I'm doing something;
like plucking grapes from the vineyard! Nyahaha!

(top)

4. Toilet Freak

It's guaranteed that I've visited almost all of the toilets in
every places I've been to. Well, serious!

Lousy toilets? Mediocre or those with prestigious status?!
Even your house! I can remember all of them like a nut in my pod.

Now if you'd ever need any toilet reviewers, you know who to call!

(top)

5. New found love - Blogging for hours

Hello Ripley, Believe it or not,

I spent an average of more than 3 hours per post goddamnit!

I look at every corner of the contents, the length, the space,
the graphics, the wordings, the insults and the jokes. You name it,
I'll kiss it!

*shivers with tears* So be appreciative now, sob!

(top)

6. Happy Past Collector

I haven't found anyone who does this, but heck, all the old stuffs
that reminiscent the good ol'days - I WANT THEM!

See, I love old games, old programs, old magazines, old toys, old gadgets that are all working. I never loved how technology progressed and spoilt every good ol' things that were made to be simple and entertaining.

(top)

7. The Forgotten Past

The 9 weird tags got me thinking.

The weirdest part of my life is that I can't really remember what
happened during my secondary school life about this;

See, I've had pen pals and phone pals that I never knew who they were, but
I could yak for hours and hours on the phone like a grandma.

If you'd ask me to do this all over again, I highly doubt I can.
What happened? Lost my mojo?!

(top)

8. An Old Shirt

I still keep a shirt that is 9 years old, unwashed.

You see, I didn't know how to operate a washer machine until 9 years later...

YEAH RIGHT. It's actually a memorable shirt that has signatures drawn
all over it during my visit to another country through a youth club.

(top)

9. Unripened Banana

I keep wanting to learn chinese, both read and write!

Surprise surprise..I actually studied chinese for more than 8 whooping years!
And what's left in my brain are little chinese characters hovering around..

Regretted ever since. But have no fear, Goober shall learn chinese very soon!

Lesson one : Art of Chopsticks!

(top)

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

handheld electronics : back to basics

Remember those little electronic games?

Way back in the early 80's when you didn't even
have to worry about rechargeable batteries exploding?


So I was looking around..and found this cute looking gadget with extreme advertisement :

..by the time I got to this message I was already wet in the pants.


Then it came again, in awe :

"beat the dragon, and grab the treasures?!?!?!"

I was screaming like a psychopath with bullets of sweats,
rummaging through the best unscratched, untouched and untempered
stock they have and pulled it out from its misery!


mercilessly ripped apart.



after debating with the Sméagol in me for a few hours, going;

"showwwwww der BLOGgersssss.."

"M-mah-master...they'd think I'm some 3 year old kid
licking lollipops in the park!"

"SHOWWWWW Them BLOGGGGERRRSSS!!!"



overpowered by the devil, I just had to show you guys this.

hey, don't blame me. It's like asking smeagol to show the ring he stole.

Apparently the company hired an environmentalist for the design,
y'know, Green all over dudes, yo.

It's actually quite small as well, miniature size.


So how does one REALLY play the game?

See, you control the knight in a trashcan, moving him down
from the top and dodge those nasty fireballs and eww repeated
claws pumping out..

..and finally don't let the dragon's tail tickle you as
you try to snatch that imaginary gold painted on the background,
quickly dodging once again, those icky claws and fireballs -
back to your mates, gaining 40 points!

---- hours later ----

God, it was simple fun. SO I played, and played,
and again I played, with my eyeballs gauging out - And finally
it struck me;

"HEY..wait the minute...
What beat the dragon?? Where the hell is it??"

Yeap, I got suckered into their stupid marketting ploy.
..I should've known 20 bucks couldn't buy me groovy stuffs.

All you ever need to do in the game is move left to right,
and right to left, no beating of dragons kids. Go home now, shooo.



There just wasn't enough challenge.
So I've taken bravery to the next level..


KILL THE DRAGON MYSELF!!!!!

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

stomaco dell'animale (animal stomach)

Today's gabbles :

"I got swallowed by an animal."


"..gee, might as well digest something before getting assimilated I guess."



"So I was there, with both arms crossed, thinking about what to eat. "

"Yeah, that's me alright.
Photo proven."

"Then it occured. Some weird marshmallow man gave me this piece of what they call, das Menü. "

"..Sure got me confused there. See, there were too many similiar RM on the menu,
and I didn't know what to choose. Should I go for RM 12.90, or RM13.90? Perhaps RM9.90 is more edible?"

"Without thinking too much, I went for RM14.90 and told the marshmellow man;"

"I'd like to order RM14.90, which'll cost me a cheesy chicken chop."

"..Sir, you're confused. See, we sell the chickens, you pay the RM."

"It was too obvious he wasn't gramatically correct, so not wanting to embarass him, I held my breath until he left."

* Poof *

This was the only reason why I'd waste my time blogging about this whole lame post.

The Cheesy Chicken Chop, is truly, smackaroory!! Slurp, woop, smack!!

Carefully grilled with cheese splatted all over it, and uh..little fries and insulted long beans, I mean, salted long beans, it truly tasted beyond an elephant's stomach.

I don't know. They weren't too generous on the fries and beans don't cha think?

Well, What do we have for drink?

The American Breakfast,
as weird as it sounds, is actually just a tea.

Comes with one pack of tasteless sugar, and another pack of pirated sugar, which is tasteless as well.

The milk was a compliment, since it was tasteless too.

Oh, the photo doesn't say anything, but it was actually very big, so big it could be used as a hat - literally.

Question :

Okay, who in their right mind would eat a chicken chop with a tea?

Answer :
"Well, why do you think I'm still alive?"

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Project Runway : Mirror Match!

Update : There is a winner. Commentary has commenced below here.

This Week's Challenge :

Contestants are placed at Star City Kuching,
Two pictures, 10 Differences.

The Challenge : Be the first to list out all 10 points!

..Only One, shall emerge as the winner.
Buona Fortuna~!!

Commentary

On This Challenge :

Contestants were tested for their ability to pay attention to details.

They were challenged to list all 10 differences
out of two mirrored photos.

7 contenders stepped forward -
but only one is chosen as the victor.

_Butt - The earliest participant. She wickedly went on to
the challenge knowingly everyone's asleep at this hour.
Her initial answers were incomplete. She later continued
with additional 2 points herself, laughing all the way
to papercrazy - "original ideas are not meant to be stolen!"
..okay I made the last part up.


Pinkcotton - The 2nd participant. With a eeky scream,
"eeeeeeeee i only found 3!!!!!!!!" and no understandable
points listed out, no points could be given. Not
even after a free lunch.



Papercrazy - The challenge continued with papercrazy. Because
she's so used to keeping every papers known to mankind,
she knowingly stole _butt's list and added another
2 answers.



Kenny Ng - It was then that Kenny, who was already smirking
behind the scene, quickly jumped out and slapped everyone out
with 10 solid points. But was it enough?!




Wayne - Far away in another island, came Wayne. No man's an island,
but a picture can surely draw more! With an artistic talent,
10 circles were drawn onto the picture with confidence
of words he uttered; "I'm the winner!"



Chen - Chen started hallucinating around 11 in the morning, and
decided to continue a little later. Little later it did not!!
With tired eyes and continued hallucination, she whispered
her final answers with a doctored photo 11 hours later.



Redsponge - Just when we all thought the competition was over,
around the corner of a washbowl, came squeezing with
awesome power that spills water when provoked -
Redsponge arrived, brashly muahahaing for the host
to check her answers.

Two pictures, 7 contestants - 10 Differences.

Who shall be crowned the winner in this week's challenge?


Contestants were judged according to their
submission time with 10 complete answers.


6 finalists survived :

Kenny Ng, you had the fastest submission time and most hit points.

Redsponge, a behind the scene email revealing the answers was a though thing
to do. It took out some of your submission time.

Wayne, you were challenged as a designer, and your confidence to win this round
has put up a challenge to the rest. You listed 10 points.

Chen, delaying your answers was a risk. But you took it with great heart and
posted up the photo with hope. But was it enough?

_Butt, awaken early in the morning to list out the answers gave u an early advantage.
It was a display of speed and great anticipation. You completed the 10 points
later.

Papercrazy, it was pretty smart of you to reuse _Butt's list as part of your answers.
Perhaps this was the only way to win smart, not hard?

---------- and now the results ----------

Chen, the risk you took to delay your answers had sacrificed your chances of winning.
I'm sorry.

Wayne, the confidence you had was challenging to the rest. As a designer, the ability
to spot on different objects in complicated scene in such a timely manner
gave you the winning hat. But you, have not listed out 10 correct points.

_Butt, addition of 2 more points at a later time could've been won if you were careful.
You too, did not win the challenge. I'm sorry.

Papercrazy, with the emergence of copy and paste technology, what you did was truly unique.
Unfortunately, _Butt's list were not correct. Adding two more points to it further pushed you away from victory.

...That leaves the two of you.

Redsponge, your answers were not viewed by anyone. A unique experience.

Kenny Ng, You had the fatest submission time and most hit points, congratulations.

One of you shall be named the winner.

Will you please step forward upon hearing your name?

REDSPONGE, YOU ARE THE WINNER !!!!
Congratulazioni!!



I'm sorry Kenny, you lost. You were very close. If only you had been earlier. Redsponge was
the first to spot the final difference in the picture, the chinese wording on the yellow and red banner.


Redsponge, you shall be receiving a mysterious and utterly weird gift from me
very soon~~



Once again, congratulations to Redsponge!

and..
Thanks everyone for playing~

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Timepieces, " Motioning The Void "

" Time is of Essence " -

An essence that fills the void which surrounds us.

We are all represented by a timepiece, an instrument that carries the substance of time.

Some are crafted with beauty; an inner sense of confidence, while some gifted with unique abilities.

Everyone, you and me, has to start from somewhere. A synthetic rubber stripe or a leather, eventually moving up to a glint of gold, judged merely by a different price tag.

Each day our lives tick away, as the pin motions itself towards the hours, minutes, and even seconds. Every composition of life; when spun repeatedly, creates a humdrum existence which many will eventually take for granted.

Have you thought about the past, filled with regrets that you tried so much to rewind but never worked? Or have you brought forth the lessons of life, ready to be challenged by each new tick?

Remember, everything that we have marked, and every decision that we made, greatly affects each one of us in one way or another in its own time. We are after all, the linchpin of time that motions the void we all believed in.

Mine was dented and cracked over the years, but it is still ticking.

What about yours?



With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Friday The 13th

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Room 205 - the short story

..it was already 7pm.
I was supposed to be at a birthday party by now.

I screamed "WAHHHHHH"

and

"..AHH!! LATE!!"

and quickly drove down to town and found myself a parking lot.

*Boop* the sound of my car door slammed right into its place.

I quickly clicked my shoes,
but suddenly the sound vanished.


There it was I, stood admiring


this nostalgic atmosphere, like a mini China.

"Beautiful ?" I asked as I resumed my walk..

..the walk towards the destination.



Entered Room 205.

We exchanged greetings with flashes, and finally took a seat.


Naturally, I proceeded to order something, it was


and thought it looked like shit. Thanks to its textures.

No, please, don't make me review it. I'm supposed to write only short
stories here.

*Oh alright* - this lamb shank tasted like duck meat. But I finished
it anyways, because I paid a hefty sum for a duck who pretended
to be a lamb before being slaughtered and served as a Lame Shank.


Grumpy me, my night brightened as we shared this wonderful plate.


The ultimate....


was truly superb for the eyes of the beholder.

Chocolate syrup topped ice creams with colorful chips,
surrounded by beautiful composition of bananas
with a tip of crispy brown wafer,

The Banana Bonkers made me went bonkers
as I kept banging my head on the table.


After the whole wonderful ordeal, I visited the washroom
and paused for a moment...stunned by this wonderful washbowl.



pretty, no?


..Finally, with a clean hand and a filled stomach, we had to call it a night.

Everyone bid farewell, exchanged flashes,
and I started walking.


I clicked my shoes,
but suddenly the sound vanished.


There it was I, stood admiring yet again



the uh.. nostalgic atmosphere, the mini inverted China.

"Beautiful ?" I asked as I resumed my walk..

..the walk towards the destination.


My car, and home.

related links :

Room 205 - The Revelation

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Mooncake Festival Aftermath

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

Mooncake-Lantern Festival

That's what you get for taking pictures on a hazy day in Malaysia.


Because everywhere is so grey, let's take a look at today's tip on

How To Obtain A Guaranteed Sick Leave

" Apply black mascara under both eyes and wear two fog masks - one covering your mouth, another strapped to your hair. Proceed to light a candle on top of your head.
Now, walk slowly to your nearest clinic and tell your doc you're a lantern, ready to be hung onto the gates tonight. "



Oh well, despite all these..

Happy Mooncake Festival everyone! :)

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober

A Week's Hiatus : The Search For Citrus

Hi everyone, I've been gone for quite some time. So here is a story of what actually happened. Enjoy! ( fear long stories? the links are provided so you could read in parts. )


Table of Contents :

Part 1 - The Assignment
Part 2 - The Vineyard
Part 3 - The Demonic SkullCraps
Part 4 - Days of Thunder
Part 5 - A New Beginning
Part 6 - The Vitamin C Journey (End)

A Week's Hiatus
“The Search For Citrus”

Part 1 - The Assignment

It all started just a week ago while I was beginning to get used to blogging once in two days.

Come monday, I received a disturbing news about having to get involved in The Great Valley of Vineyard, where harvest is usually large, but the workers are oh-so few.

"Goober. You have been chosen." the words uttered by our infamous Professor X. "Chosen, for what?" I questioned.

I shouldn't have asked.

Monday was already one of those days where eyes would just keep seeing these four characters in plural; "B-L-U-E-S". The last thing I would want is to be surrounded by alluring sexy goobers before I fully become a ground nut, not to work till I meet my end days!

"Chosen, to retrieve the forbidden grapes from the core of The Great Valley of Vineyard.", "..but of course, with a line, that has death." snickered X as he snickered again.

"L-line w-with a..what? A dead line??" were the words I remember vividly before I grasped my pod, rubbed my lungs, and pulled my vines before I collapsed with a hand on the ground, and finally fell down unconscious.

(back to menu)

Part 2 - The Vineyard


The opening ceremony was truly a great one. So great that it took me hours to regain consciousness and finally be able to spell "B-L-U-E-S" once again.

The Great Valley of Vineyard - Is a place filled with richly planted coco and cherries, pineapples, grapes and all fruits ever known to little goobers.

... but no one could ever touch any of the beauties that lie right infront of their squinting eyes, for it was evilishly guarded by demons with red-glowing eye balls, ready to splur their hot vocanic saliva.

My friend Sir Goodo-Gaada once tried approaching the demons but was melted right infront of my eyes. Till this day I still sadly mourn for the lost of a great friend.

Perhaps it is such a great place to be that some would rather just die for it.

Having amassed great amount of confidence, I took a deep breath and slowly walked towards the stairs that led to the opening of The Great Valley of Vineyard.

(back to menu)

Part 3 - The Demonic SkullCraps


" WhaaaaaaSssssaaaaaaap .....? " asked SkullCrap BuluJeng. To which I explained my mission impossible assigned by Professor X. It took me 24 hours to explain.

You see, SkullCraps were once fallen orcs who were later given a chance of another life by pledging to serve the Dark Lord SaudiArabiaman through the pact of their brains, bonded by an eternal duty of guarding The Great Valley of Vineyard until the day they repay their sins of their barbaric brains. It is said that those who read Mr. Goober’s blog daily could be saved within a day.

After a long-ho explanation, The SkullCraps finally agreed to let me continue my journey in search for the grapes. The green, lush, and beautiful flowers with fruits that bear relaxation everywhere, the very valley of love that I hoped to reach before the day my pod cracks in olden age, had been the sole motivation of my journey.

(back to menu)

Part 4 - Days of Thunder


The path to the hidden citrus within the core of The Great Valley of Vineyard is a legend of a folklore, a tale that everyone hoped to have and hold; but alas, no one ever knew whether it truly existed or was all nothing but a dream.

But how does one achieve, without having to dream?

Looking again at the piece of assignment passed to me, I thought perhaps it would be better if this was just a dream. So I quickly proceeded to slap myself on the left, and was reminded of the lesson from the famous Chinese philosopher – Lao Fu Chi who once said;

“When someone slaps you on one side of the face, you must let him slap you on the other for balance of power.”

Having known to be alone, I threw a pebble towards the foot of the mountain and recoiled back to my face, causing a painful moment of pain as I counted 1... 2.....

"OUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHED!!!!!!!

Recovering from the silliness of my own introduction to the foot of the mountain, I quickly ran with the winding roads that will eventually lead me to the top of the The Great Valley of The Vineyard.

I began seeing tired goobers working along the way as I brought my steps forward, pausing to watch how much trouble and pain everyone has to go through in their lives to reach something that might not have an end.

Days passed by, and like a thunder that comes right after the lights, so did I slowly weaknened my pace, having found many more pain that followed. And it struck me, right in the nuts.

.. I fell, and almost gave up.

(back to menu)

Part 5 - A New Beginning


With arms clinging onto the floor of pain, my eyes raised towards the sudden light that sung to me. I began seeing lights that came from afar, to which gave me hope of a new beginning.

Hesitating no more, I dusted myself and stood up.

As I approached nearer, it all became clearer. It was something that one would have to celebrate when it presented itself to its owner. The beauties that manifest from the colored hope is something not to be ignored as it was once said that the goddess of the moon brought them with her own hands, forward to earth.

With a sick body, I reached my arms out as best as I could, and slowly opened the moon cakes and took a few bites.

"Hallelujah!!!" exclaimed myself in cheerful and joyful manner as I took a few more munches! It was truly a new beginning!

(back to menu)

Part 6 – The Vitamin C Journey (End)


Once tummy’s all filled up, it was high time I paid attention to my mission for the retrieval of grapes assigned by Professor X. Having a sensitive stomach known only to those who work within The Great Valley of Vineyard - I burped.

The gas generated from within my stomach, proceeded through my throat, reflected between my teeth, resulting an impact that kept pushing my mouth to open wide, as it slowly hissed out from it.

The poisonous substance slowly formed into what looked like a cloud as it flew in a gentle manner, tip-toeing in the skies, dancing in the moonlights towards a rock as tall as the mountains. On there, it laid its last breath, and vanished into air.

Suddenly the rock started to shake and crack, with rays shining out loud, demanding an instant attention of my eyes. And lo and behold, the grapes that I had to bring back appeared right before me, with dews of light dripping from its flesh as the rock slowly calmed its strength to vibrate.

Without hesitation, I stretched my hands and quickly snatched them!

And lo and behold once again -------- The whole Great Valley of Vineyard started to shake violently; in layman’s term; IT’S A FREAKING EARTHQUAKE!!!!!!! THE WHOLE PLACE SHOOK AND SHIFTED, rocks cracked and pebbles flew in the air, trees screaming for their lives to survive, and hope crumbling down the paths that led to no way as everything fell, into the deep abyss of darkness...

...........

Miraculously, I was still alive.

I looked around, and saw many hallow paths that survived the great shifting of the earth.
It wasn’t an easy sight to behold.

Remembering the dreams we once had, and the laughter of joy we shared, with the promise of hope greatly remembered;

… the search for the hidden citrus had just begun.

(back to menu)

With that, and a pat on the pod;
"Hey, it's just me!" - Mr. Goober